Welp...

Every now and then I get really annoyed with people, our society, FB and Pinterest.  Okay okay not with Pinterest as a whole but with all those pins about announcing your pregnancy.  Its no secret here on this blog that I suffer infertility problems.  But seeing how big of a deal people make it to just announce that they got pregnant (probably on their first try) is just devastating to me and makes me feel like this big huge failure. While I love the idea of announcing in a big way it just pulls at my heartstrings and reminds me of how far behind (my) schedule I really am.

Now don't get me wrong, I am truly excited and happy for those who can and do get pregnant but I still feel a little, ok A LOT, jealous of them.

You might be asking, now why is she ranting about pregnancy and such?  We had a big week this past week.  I was feeling just fine on Monday and Tuesday.  But then around 9:00 on Tuesday night, I was sitting on the couch watching "The Big Bang Theory" when I got these intense, severe, constant pain in my lower right abdominal area (think my right fallopian tube).  I have felt this pain before back in 2010 when I suffered from an ectopic pregnancy, but there was NO WAY that it was happening again.  I told Thomas that I needed to go to bed and lay down and could he please bring me some pain meds.  It wasn't more than 10 minutes after taking the pills that I was in the bathroom puking.  And then I was crying because it reminded me of last time this happened I was with my mom, I miss her so much.  I told Thomas that we might need to go to the ER, because I was pretty sure this was another ectopic, I have no idea how it could be, but what is the other explanation?  We called his mom to let her know that we might be going to the hospital that night, and then had her call Thomas' brother's girlfriend (who is an ER nurse) we gave her the symptoms and she gave us some advice.  Then I called the emergency line for my OBGYN and talked to the Dr. on call.  We were advised to take a pregnancy test.  If the pain continued we should go to the ER as I am at risk of an ectopic pregnancy, otherwise wait until morning and call during office hours.

I had to call my administrator to let them know what was going on and that I would not be able to go in to work the following day.  Thomas got back with the pregnancy test but I was unable to take it due to no fluids in my body.  Then just as quickly as the pain came on the pain went away.  Woke up in the morning to take the test.  Never in my life did I think I would be so disappointed and upset to see a positive on that little stick.  How could I be pregnant?  I am only 15 days into my cycle!!  Long story short we had to go in for blood tests and ultrasounds.  I had fluid (blood) in my pelvic region. a couple of cysts on my left ovary, a small one on my right and an inflamed right fallopian tube.  My blood work came back with counts high enough to guesstimate that I was 6 weeks pregnant.  I needed to repeat my bloodwork two days later to see what was happening.

On Friday my count decreased by about half, indicating that I was miscarrying.  I have felt some discomfort since Tuesday, missing my mom a lot, getting a lot of comfort from friends and family, and feelings of sadness but also hope.  We a hoping that this is just a normal miscarriage and that I am not at risk for another fallopian rupture requiring surgery.  I find great satisfaction in the fact that we were able to get pregnant all on our own.

The thing that really bothers me is how much we (women) hold in and keep to ourselves.  I did not know that so many women in my life we also struggling with getting pregnant, or having miscarriages.  Why do we choose to fight this battle on our own?  We can receive so much more by sharing with others and getting comfort knowing that we are not alone or the only ones going through this!  Please do me a favor.  Talk about it.  Share about it.  Don't hold it in.  You will find so much more healing if you share.  Your disappointment in others will not be as great if you just share what is going on.

Our Lord works in mysterious ways but he works for our good.  I have faith in his plan.  I know that he is good.

Please share!

♥ Ashley

[recipe] White Chicken Enchiladas

via

As I have mentioned on here before, New Years Day is enchilada day at our house, I love it because it keeps me in the kitchen while the games are going on (yes I would rather be in the kitchen than watching the games on tv - guilty!)

I usually make my momala's recipe but thought I would change it up a bit and tried a new recipe (we actually had three different types on enchiladas; my momala's, these, and my MIL's), I was hoping to try out a white chicken recipe and thought I would just take a look through some of those cookbooks I have sitting on the shelf and came across a recipe from The Pioneer Woman.  These were delicious but oh so time consuming.

For some reason I cannot find the recipe in the book online so I will do my best from memory and then change it once I get home and can actually look at the book.

Ingredients:

3 Bell Peppers (green, yellow, orange)

2 Serrano chiles

2 jalepenos

1 onion

3 cups shredded cooked chicken

sour cream

chicken broth

butter

flour

salt & pepper

spices

3 1/2 cups Jack Cheese - shredded

tortillas

Directions:

1. Over the flame of a gas burner, on the BBQ or in the Broiler scald and blacken the Bell Peppers and Serrano Chiles, then place into a large plastic bag and let sweat/steam for 30 minutes.  Then take off the skin and dice, set aside

2. Dice up the raw onion and jalepenos and then saute in 1 T oil over medium heat until softened.  Add in the half of the diced peppers and chiles.

3. Add in the butter to melt then the flour stir to combine and cook the flour for 1 minute.  Then add in the chicken broth and sauce should thicken.  Add in the sour cream and 1 1/2 cups Jack Cheese.

4. With the shredded chicken add in the remaining half of peppers and chiles and 1 cup of Jack Cheese.

5.  Heat up the tortillas and prepare baking dish with cooking spray.  Assemble the enchiladas with a bit of the chicken mixture in a tortilla and then wrap up and place in baking dish.

6. Once all the enchiladas are assembled pour over the cream sauce, top with remaining cheese and bake in a 350 oven for about 35 minutes or until bubbling.

7. Serve with additional sour cream, cilantro, guacamole, and any other toppings you like.

Linked to Tasty Tuesdays

enjoy!

♥ Ashley

12 Days of Christmas

Last year I was really interested in finding out about the 12 Days of Christmas Song  I had a friend on Facebook that was posting about the "meanings" of each day so I thought I would do some research and found this website that had a devotional to go along with each of the days. The 12 Days of Christmas start on Christmas Day (December 25th) and go through to January 5th (the 12th Day) and then you celebrate Epiphany on January 6th.

I was hoping to do this again but since I was unable to access the internet on my laptop I had to wait until I came back to work.  So instead of doing the separate posts like I did last year, I will just do one big post.

First Day:  A Partridge in a Pear Tree, represents Jesus Christ the Son of God

Second Day: Two Turtle Doves, represent the Old and New Testaments in the Bible

Third Day: Three French Hens, represent the 3 Theological Values; Faith, Hope and Love

Fourth Day: Four Calling Birds, represent the 4 Gospels; Matthew, Mark, Luke and John

Fifth Day: Five Gold Rings, represent the Torah (first five books of the Bible), Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy

Sixth Day: Six Geese A-Laying, represent the 6 days of creation confessing the God is the creator

Seventh Day: Seven Swans A-Swimming, representing the 7 gifts of the Holy Spirit; Prophecy, Ministry, Teaching, Exhortation, Giving, Leading, and Compassion

Eighth Day: Eight Maids A-Milking, represent the Beatitudes; Blessed are the Poor in Spirit, those who Mourn, the Meek, those who Hunger and Thirst for Righteousness, the Merciful, the Pure in Heart, the Peacemakers, and those who are Persecuted for Righteousness' sake.

Ninth Day: Nine Ladies Dancing, represents the 9 fruits of the Holy Spirit; Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Generosity, Kindness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control.

Tenth Day: Ten Lords A-Leaping, representing the 10 Commandments; You shall have no other gods before me, Do not make an idol, Do not take God's name in vain, Remember the Sabbath Day, Honor your father and mother, Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not covet.


Eleventh Day: Eleven Pipers Piping, represents the eleven Faithful Apostles; Simon Peter,  Andrew, James, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James bar Alphaeus, Simon the Zealot, Judas bar James. (Luke 6:14-16). The list does not include the twelfth disciple, Judas Iscariot who betrayed Jesus to the religious leaders and the Romans.

Twelfth Day: Twelve Drummers Drumming, represents The Twelve points of doctrine in the Apostles' Creed 1) I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth. 2) I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord. 3) He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary. 4) He suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried. He descended into hell [the grave]. 5) On the third day he rose again. He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father. 6) He will come again to judge the living and the dead. 7) I believe in the Holy Spirit, 8) the holy catholic Church, 9) the communion of saints, 10) the forgiveness of sins, 11) the resurrection of the body, 12) and life everlasting.

Epiphany: January 6th.


Click on the link to the website above and you will be able to navigate to the devotionals for these...Sorry again that I was unable to post these when I was hoping to.

♥ Ashley

[recipe] Rosemary Cranberry Spread

I mentioned that I served this delicious dip/spread at my Ladies Christmas Tea.  I found it on Pinterest and it was SO easy and SO good.  Here is the LINK to the original post.









Ingredients:

• 8 ounces cream cheese, softened
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
• 4 tablespoons dried sweetened cranberries
• 2 teaspoons chopped fresh rosemary
• fresh cracked pepper and kosher salt 

Directions:

1. Place all cream cheese into a bowl and using a spoon, fold in all ingredients until well combined.
2. Serve along side crackers or toasted baguette slices, (I served mine with Parmesan Butterhorns)

Hope you enjoy! Let me know how you liked this recipe!

Linked to: Tasty Tuesdays and What I Whipped UpWednesdays


♥ Ashley

Happy New Year

Still working on getting my bloody pictures on this here blog.  I had to go back to work today, something about Christmas Break being over and the kids are going to show up or something like that.  I will say that it is nice to get back to a schedule of some sorts. 

Hubby and I had a wonderful time spending the Christmas holiday together (though he had to return to work last Thursday - haha).  We really didn't do too much, mostly stayed at home and enjoyed each other.  We (I mean I) did do some shopping after Christmas and got some great things!  Mostly stuff I didn't actually need need but needed if you know what I mean. 

Anyways here's what we did:

Hosted Christmas Eve with his family at our house - delicious Prime Rib!
Spent Christmas morning leisurely together opening gifts, just the two of us (for the first time and hopefully the last time it will be just the two of us)
Went out to dinner at a restaurant with my immediate family on Christmas Day (our first without my mom)
Day after Christmas Shopping (scored BIG at Old Navy on a sweater and some cardigans and Kohls)
Going out to lunch to celebrate Christmas with my moms side of the family - oh the entitlement some old people feel they have.
More after Christmas Shopping (or browsing)
Evening in at home and going to bed at 10:30 on NYE
3rd Annual Enchilada New Years Day and Rose Bowl Game watching at our house
Attempting to DIY my pantry doors into a magnetic chalkboard -FYI didn't work need to come up with an alternative plan

Recipe for the Enchiladas HERE as well as my NY Resolution for 2012.  I think that I did a fairly good job at keeping my pushups plan.  Although there were some days (ok maybe weeks, possibly a month or two?) that I failed but overall I would say that I did see improvement.  While 65 was A LOT to do at one time, by the end the first 30 were pretty easy to do. 

My resolutions this year are hopefully ones that I can uphold.  I am going to do my same plan but with jumping jacks instead of the pushups.  I am also hoping to use less paper towels at home.  I think that I can do this and hopefully letting you all know what they are will help me to keep them.

What are some of your resolutions??

♥ Ashley

Ladies Christmas Tea Party

Alright it's been a little while since I have posted. I wish I could say that I have a good reason but I really don't. Except for the fact that I really don't like posting from my phone, which is what I am doing now since my computer wo t let me connect to the wifi at Starbucks. So here I am. Happy Mew Year. I had so many plans of posts to do during my Christmas break but that obviously didn't happen.

So let me get a little bit organized here  let me tell you about my Ladies Christmas Tea I hosted and I will share some pictures soon. Once I can get them off my computer.

Every December I host a holiday open house Tea Party for Ladies only. I love it because it gives me real incentive to get my house all decorated for the season. Not like I need much encouragement but anything helps, right?

I had a lovely time with several friends attending as well as some co workers including my boss. It was nice to have an assortment of guests and to enjoy and celebrate the holiday season. My best friend came home from Thailand just before Thanksgiving so it was so special to have her there as well. She arrived early to help me set up and so we could have a chance to catch up.

We had lots of goodies to eat and of course we had tea. I got to use my glass snack plates and glasses.

Here is the menu:

Sweets; rolo stuffed sugar cookies, gingerbread cookies, peanut butter balls, and Linzer cookies
Savory; cucumber sandwiches, tomato sandwiches, rosemary cranberry cream cheese spread, crackers and butterhorns.

Hopefully pics will be up soon!!

♥ Ashley