Can I be honest with you? I was severely dreading potty training Finnley. I didn't want to do it, it just seemed like so much work. We had a window (actually probably 3) before Séamus was born but my pregnant self just did not have it in me, though I did want her out of diapers before he came.
But that didn't happen. Actually, she stayed in those diapers until after Séamus turned one 🙈, Good Job Mom, way to win that one 😜. Finnley can be challenging at times, very stubborn, and full of all the emotions (like super hard, but we have oils for that). So as you can imagine I was less than thrilled to start potty training her. I remembered Ellie giving us a bit of push back, but I've always been able to talk her off a ledge quickly. Whereas Finnley is a whole other story.
With each child you have you learn that what worked for one, won't necessarily work for the other. And let me tell you that doesn't ring truer than true for my girls. It became clear right away that taking Finnley to the potty every 30 minutes wasn't going be her thing. She is more independent and likes to do things her way, isn't that nice?
We talked about going on the potty a lot and while she was receptive to it in conversation the actual act of going into the bathroom was pretty much out of the question. But she was also very insistent about going to Preschool, where I told her she had to be in underwear. Pretty soon August was nearly over and girlfriend was still in her diaper. This just wasn't going to work, something was going to have to give and we needed to do it fast because our schedule was about to get all messed up because school was set to start. Ellie had the luxury of being the oldest and I wasn't working when we were potty training her, so our schedule was wide open! Now our schedule is so different for Finnley since we have school drop off and pick up (over an hour in the car both ways) five days a week for Ellie and then she is in Preschool herself. We finally started potty training Finnley at 3 years and 4 months old.
So, something had to give and we needed to switch gears. It was time to just do away with the diapers and go straight undies. Rather than setting a timer and taking her to the toilet every 30 minutes, I said to her on repeat, annoyingly often "Finnley, tell Mama when you have to go potty". Our first day was riddled with accidents and zero successes. I told her that when she goes on the potty or as she calls it "make a wet" that she'll get a bath or a marshmallow or a chocolate chip or choose your reward. After each accident I would put her on the potty and remind her that this is where she "makes a wet". This went on for 3 days...lots of underwear changes and cleaning the pee off the floor with Thieves. Thankfully she didn't have any accidents in the car 🙏. Finally on day four, things started to click and we were about 50/50 with accidents and successes!! By day 6, I was so tired of constantly saying "Tell Mama when you have to go potty" but she did it!! Just in time too, because she started Preschool the next day!
Now were over a month and a half into this and she rarely has any accidents...except for the #2. We're in the car a lot and drive over 2.5 hours to our Grey Cottage and she does amazingly well the whole drive! Going #2 is still a work in progress, she doesn't go often enough for her to get the feeling and it's quite uncomfortable for her when she finally does...it will take some work but I know that once she understands the feeling and sensation and how much nicer it will be for everyone involved for her to go on the potty that we won't have any problems.
Here's what I've learned from potty training both of my girls and then also being a part of the potty training for 3 of the children I've nannied over the years...you have to do it when you're both ready. If your child isn't ready it's just going to be a terrible mess. It's really not as horrible as you make it out to be in your head and those first few days are hard but so so important for you to stick with it, kids need that structure and expectation and follow through. Plus those first early days get lost in the shuffle of your daily lives and after a while you'll stop and think back and try to remember what life was like before you potty trained because it's all so natural now!! So hang in there and do what feels right for you, when it feels right for you. I think the most important thing is to talk about it a lot leading up to actually going for it and sometimes kids do well with a deadline. We told Finnley she needed to be in underwear to go to school and that was the kicker for her, she did it!!
What method did you use for potty training? How did it go? What did you learn from it? I would love to know your experience, please share with me below in the comments!
♥ Ashley
But that didn't happen. Actually, she stayed in those diapers until after Séamus turned one 🙈, Good Job Mom, way to win that one 😜. Finnley can be challenging at times, very stubborn, and full of all the emotions (like super hard, but we have oils for that). So as you can imagine I was less than thrilled to start potty training her. I remembered Ellie giving us a bit of push back, but I've always been able to talk her off a ledge quickly. Whereas Finnley is a whole other story.
With each child you have you learn that what worked for one, won't necessarily work for the other. And let me tell you that doesn't ring truer than true for my girls. It became clear right away that taking Finnley to the potty every 30 minutes wasn't going be her thing. She is more independent and likes to do things her way, isn't that nice?
We talked about going on the potty a lot and while she was receptive to it in conversation the actual act of going into the bathroom was pretty much out of the question. But she was also very insistent about going to Preschool, where I told her she had to be in underwear. Pretty soon August was nearly over and girlfriend was still in her diaper. This just wasn't going to work, something was going to have to give and we needed to do it fast because our schedule was about to get all messed up because school was set to start. Ellie had the luxury of being the oldest and I wasn't working when we were potty training her, so our schedule was wide open! Now our schedule is so different for Finnley since we have school drop off and pick up (over an hour in the car both ways) five days a week for Ellie and then she is in Preschool herself. We finally started potty training Finnley at 3 years and 4 months old.
So, something had to give and we needed to switch gears. It was time to just do away with the diapers and go straight undies. Rather than setting a timer and taking her to the toilet every 30 minutes, I said to her on repeat, annoyingly often "Finnley, tell Mama when you have to go potty". Our first day was riddled with accidents and zero successes. I told her that when she goes on the potty or as she calls it "make a wet" that she'll get a bath or a marshmallow or a chocolate chip or choose your reward. After each accident I would put her on the potty and remind her that this is where she "makes a wet". This went on for 3 days...lots of underwear changes and cleaning the pee off the floor with Thieves. Thankfully she didn't have any accidents in the car 🙏. Finally on day four, things started to click and we were about 50/50 with accidents and successes!! By day 6, I was so tired of constantly saying "Tell Mama when you have to go potty" but she did it!! Just in time too, because she started Preschool the next day!
Now were over a month and a half into this and she rarely has any accidents...except for the #2. We're in the car a lot and drive over 2.5 hours to our Grey Cottage and she does amazingly well the whole drive! Going #2 is still a work in progress, she doesn't go often enough for her to get the feeling and it's quite uncomfortable for her when she finally does...it will take some work but I know that once she understands the feeling and sensation and how much nicer it will be for everyone involved for her to go on the potty that we won't have any problems.
Here's what I've learned from potty training both of my girls and then also being a part of the potty training for 3 of the children I've nannied over the years...you have to do it when you're both ready. If your child isn't ready it's just going to be a terrible mess. It's really not as horrible as you make it out to be in your head and those first few days are hard but so so important for you to stick with it, kids need that structure and expectation and follow through. Plus those first early days get lost in the shuffle of your daily lives and after a while you'll stop and think back and try to remember what life was like before you potty trained because it's all so natural now!! So hang in there and do what feels right for you, when it feels right for you. I think the most important thing is to talk about it a lot leading up to actually going for it and sometimes kids do well with a deadline. We told Finnley she needed to be in underwear to go to school and that was the kicker for her, she did it!!
What method did you use for potty training? How did it go? What did you learn from it? I would love to know your experience, please share with me below in the comments!
♥ Ashley
